Consumer Relations
We at Allied Chemical are devoted to the satisfaction of you, the consumer. If you have had any problems whatsoever with any of the products or services offered by Allied Chemical, please fill out the form below and click the "submit" button. 

We appreciate this opportunity to review your situation and offer any solution we can prior to your taking any legal action that might require us to set the wheels of the juggernaut that is our staggeringly competent and experienced legal team into action.

Product Information
Please indicate the product or service involved, then check the box below it that best describes your concern:
Farmer Fred's Happydale Ham Spread All-Purpose Spray Blobster
Substandard taste Misdirected spray nozzle Rancid drawn butter
Foul odor Spray nozzle fell off "Fishy" odor
Ruptured tamper seal Blockage in spray nozzle Zip-Krak Shell failure
Bone/gristle count above 50% by volume No spray nozzle included Eye injury due to Zip-Krak Shell splinter
Offensive statement scratched into top layer of hamspread Exploding spray can due to heat Excessive clumping
Trichinosis Exploding spray can due to cold Oil separation
Scurvy Exploding spray can at room temperature Krill still living
  Streaking Evolved Krill
Foreign object in food: After contact with skin or membrane:  
Hair Burning  
Fingernail Chafing  
Insect egg(s) Blistering  
Insect larva(e) Itching  
Insect(s) Flaking  
rodent tail or other rodent part Tingling  
ring, anklet, or other jewelry Loss of bowel control  
silver filling, gold cap or other dental item Uncontrollable hiccups  
  Excessive hair growth  
Personal Information
Required fields are indicated in RED text
First name  
Last name  
Street address  
Zip/Postal Code  
Religious Affiliation  
Political Party Affiliation  
By clicking on "Submit" you are acknowledging that the above information is true to the best of your knowledge and that you are a good person. You are also acknowledging that Allied Chemical will have final say in this matter and that you will agree to any settlement (or lack thereof) specified.